Build your hot body in the kitchen – literally.

April 30, 2017 Ashley 0 Comments

I heard an interesting exercise hack today:

“Every time you hit the loo, do this workout!” it read.

What then followed was something to the effect of, “Do ten crunches, ten squats, and ten pushups – right after you do your duty.” It was intriguing to say the least. I love the idea of getting in your gains in the middle of your day. That said, this definitely isn’t for everyone. The issue? Well, if you’re at work (and get sweaty, like I do, at the mere notion of doing lunges), that can end up landing you hot mess status of unprofessional proportions post potty visit.

(“Hi! This is backsweat-… I mean this’s Betty! How can I direct your call?”)

Also, if you don’t have a private potty, that’s kinda weird for both you and whoever else comes in there in the middle of your sweaty sesh. Not to mention the fact that – you’re on the clock. If your boss (or tattletale coworker, for that matter) happens to catch you, it doesn’t look altogether good or professional. So, as great in intention as this suggestion is, it could use a little improvement. For instance, why not build your fitness multitasking into the other half of health (more than half, actually)? Why not build it into food prep time?

This is actually even better, inasmuch as it makes you more mindful.

Whether you’re cooking something in the oven or doing some nightly nuking is irrelevant. Either way, what you can do, is make a productive game of it. See, I myself like to have more chores all done before dinner. That’s my edible Zen moment. And I don’t wanna worry about any tasks after. That said, I’m impatient, love food more than most people, and want my meal ready yester-second most of the time. So, what I do is (instead of waiting around the supper-cooker like it’s an Apple store the morning the latest iphone’s due to be released), is have a race to finish before my dinner does. And what’m I trying to finish? Squats and squalor scrubbing. Bicep curls and broom pushing. Abs and vacuuming. That’s right. Whatever time I have before that bell goes ding, I need to fit in thirty squats, thirty crunches, thirty bicep curls, and thirty tricep curls.

Then, with the time left over – I burn off even more by doing as many chores as humanly possible. That way, I can also enjoy my forthcoming fodder, mentally unfettered. This works well on a weight loss level for two reasons. First? When you’re doing any kind of a workout right before eating, the tendency is to eat only what you need, and to eat healthier overall (Like, maybe not drown my soup in salt, avoid adding those extra noodles I don’t need, and not go back for round two after I knock out bowl number one.)

The second reason it works is more psychological. When our habitat’s trashy, we don’t feel so great about ourselves. And what do those of us with tendencies to abuse food do when we don’t feel so good about ourselves? You guessed it. We get stressed – and stress eat. By using the other half’ve your time to lightly cleanse your residence (we’re not even talking deep scrubbing or burning sage, here), you eradicate that catastrophic seed before it can sprout.

So, instead’ve working out at potty time, save it for when you’d usually watch the pot boil.

And you might just boil off that potbelly!