Dodgeball: rubber ducking, you make weight loss lotsa fun.

February 1, 2016 Ashley 0 Comments

Are you feeling fat?

And mad at yourself for not getting un-fat fast enough?

Then why not fix both things, by throwing things at other people – and losing el-beez as you do?

Now, before we all start throwing our scales at strangers, lemme clarify. By “things”, I specifically mean round, rubber balls. And by “other people”, I mean the willing, consenting participants of a dodgeball match in which you’re taking part. This idea came to me the other day when I was catching up with a good friend of mine. Naturally (since we’re both women which means we both love carping about body issues), the issue of weight maintenance came up. Unlike me, she’s kinda not a fan of running for fun. She’ll do it, but it’s definitely not her first pick for fitness activities. What is, I wondered?

“I miss dodgeball,” she told me.

While I’d recalled her talking about this hobby before, I couldn’t really relate prior to this year.

In fact, I was kinda closed minded about it back when she suggested I try it out.

It actually wasn’t until a few months ago, when I tried it at a trampoline park, that I realized just what I’d been missing out on. Granted, I was bouncing during my ball battle (elevating the elation level tremendously), but the fact remained: averting and delivering violent strikes with rubber orbs was not only good, giddy fun – but it was an intense workout. If you didn’t pause too long. (And god bless you if you do and you aren’t on my team.) Plus, I did remember my friend not only feeling fulfilled – but looking pretty fit – when she was a part of her job’s dodgeball team. Thus, I couldn’t help but look up this fun activity and find out: just how good a workout is sphere sniping fellow species members?

According to the Center for Disease Control, a pretty damn good one. Especially if there are stakes to it.

(No, I mean, like, if you do it competitively. Versus suckering out by quitting early.)

Specifically, the CDC’s listed it as a “moderate-intensity” workout that’s fab for fogies, not just kids. (FYI: Mod-instense just means the kinda workout where you can sputter out short sentence strings, but not sing, “Hello… from the other side…” – lest you legit end up on “the other side” when you keel over from not enough oxygen.) And that’s great news for those who need to rekindle their sense of childlike play (but also kinda wanna hurt people while they do it). In a way, it’s almost like a more organized version of a pillow fight. But with more clothes. And you hafta have better aim. And boys are allowed to play.

So, that’s all well and good, but let’s talk some numbers here. How much can I burn?

Well, if we’re talking ball brawling on solid ground, Livestrong suggests it’s all about how much effort you put into it. If you’re just half azz tossing it like some gym class slag afraid to sweat before she sees her crush in second period, then, no it’s not exercise. You’re not gonna go pyro on the gyro calories you just ingested for lunch unless you get your head in the game and take it seriously for the warfare that it is.

Rev it up a level, though, and they say and you can burn up to 150 calories in under half an hour.

Not bad, I figure. I mean, sure, you can join your local MMA academy or go paintballing. (Both’ve which I highly recommend if you can afford it.) But the nice thing about dodgeball is that you don’t hafta pay for your cardio combat. For zero dinero, you can create your own Fight Club where you and your posse launch painless cannonballs at a common enemy. As far as aerobically expelling pent up vexations sans breaking the bank (or the law), I’d say this one ranks fairly high.

So, if you’re up for weight loss won via violent fun, then mayhaps ducking rubber balls is for you.